Monday, 1 February 2016

Write a (funny) joke


When I was in primary school:



I always wanted to create jokes but I never really knew how (and still don't). I remember at some point - we were probably around eight - a friend of mine and myself came up with the joke:

Me: Why isn't a cheetah very good at hide and seek?
You: I don't know. Why isn't a cheetah very good at hide and seek?
Me: Because it always gets spotted.


However, looking back I'm pretty sure one of us probably just read it in a Christmas cracker? But at least it was a joke. Rarely do any of the children I work with, tell me "jokes" that actually make any sense. This is a "joke" a young child told me a few days ago: 

Child: Why did the kangaroo slide in the park?
Me: I don't know. Why did the kangaroo slide in the park?
Child: Because it was very funny.

But I did make up one "joke" while I was a younger. When I was probably a little older than I care to remember, I created this little gem:

Me: What do you call a girl with green hair?
You: I don't know. What do you call a girl with green hair?
Me: Jade.


Hilarious right? Try to control your laughter, if you can?

And so the other night in bed, I found myself - struggling to sleep and - thinking that although I've made plenty of off the cuff comments and written a few things in blogs, poems, film scripts etc that I consider to be funny (and people have laughed at), I don't think that I've ever actually written a joke before? Or at least, if the girl with the green hair "joke" is anything to go by, certainly never a funny one. So as I lay awake at 3.33am the other morning - despairing at the fact that my alarm would be ringing in my ears in just four hours time - I attempted to write my first ever (funny) joke.

And this is the best - and only joke - that I could come up with:

Me: What do you call a giraffe on stilts?
You: I don't know. What do you call a giraffe on stilts.
Me: Anything you want. It's unlikely it will ever hear you.


And I'm not sure if it - ok I'm pretty confident that it doesn't - qualifies as being funny? But at least it's original. By which I mean that I'm pretty sure I didn't read it in a Christmas cracker. And I think it's slightly better than the kangaroo joke a child told me the other day?

So I think I'm probably going to put my professional joke writing career on hold for now. However, if I'm ever stuck for cash it is something I could always fall back on (not thats a joke haha). 


HAPPY JOKE TELLING (& writing) :)


Ps. If you have any good jokes, especially ones that you created yourself, please put them in the comments below.


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